Support

      Since I have stared this blog, I have had a lot of feedback.  Most is in total support of me and my journey.  This is why I know I have the greatest support system of all time.  That being said the “support” I have received through the years hasn't always been positive.  Sometimes the great support I thought I was getting was in fact so horribly bad for me.  At other times the negative or lack of support is what pushed me the hardest.  Having someone tell me I CAN’T do something is just like a challenge to me.  It makes me say “Oh yeah? Watch ME!”

       Like everyone, I have my own past.  My own story, some of it is sad.  Some is utterly unbearable.  Most of it is “cloud nine” happy.  I have been lucky to have had 2 parents that loved me.  They handled my weight issues completely different.  My mother went out of her way to tell me how beautiful I was, no matter what. She would say regardless of my weight or size there was nothing I couldn't do.  She would try so very hard to get me eat the right foods.  She wasn't a gourmet chef, but she did try and make sure we got all our protein and veggies. (Never 2 of the same color in one meal.)  This kind of support is imperative.  To know that you are loved is a support like no other.  Now, my father had a different approach.  His approach was flat out honesty.  Some people may think it’s bad to tell your daughter to lose a few pounds. This however, is what I needed to hear. Of course facing the facts is sometimes painful, and uncomfortable.  Yes, it might have hurt my feelings at the time, but like they say “honesty is the best policy.” Having this balance is why I may have been one of the luckiest children in the world.  I had the best of both worlds. 

         Like all girls growing up, before you meet Prince Charming you have to kiss a lot of frogs.  I have had my share of frogs in prince costumes.  Whether it’s healthy or not, these frogs have had their own little influences on my weight.  Looking back I see how it’s possible they thought they were helping.  In fact, they were making things way worse. One particular frog wouldn't date me unless I dropped a few pounds.  I did everything in my power to get that guy…this is when starvation reared its ugly head.   Once I dropped the weight we were a great couple!  He really was a great person.  Except for when it came to my body.  There were times we would be eating out, and he would ask if I was going to eat all that?  Yup, that happened.  At the time I thought it was because he cared.  Until I realized that what he cared about was how I looked. This is when I learned that unless a guy could love me regardless of how I looked that I didn't need him.

         My friends and family are also an important piece of the support puzzle.  I have a lot that are an infinite source of encouragement.  Constant texts, emails, and calls saying good job and keep it up.  My husband has seen my weight all over the scale.  He has always loved me the same. My family is incredibly awesome. (But that’s another blog post) I have had few so called friends along the way that have had a negative outlook on my journey, and that’s ok.  Like I said, I see that as a challenge, kind of like a double dare to succeed. So if you have people in your life that may have a negative outlook on what you are trying to do. Let that push you to not only get the job done, but do it with as much sparkle as you can!! 

"Were you born to resist or be abused

I swear ill never give in, I refuse

is someone getting the best, the best, the best of you?"- Foo Fighters